How to Build the Bond of Trust
Darryl Stickel shares a few best practices for parents who want to improve the bond of trust with their children.
When it comes to trust, kids are a special case. They tend to trust us more than they should when they are young and less than they should as they mature. Unfortunately, our kids tend to trust us least when they could use our guidance the most. As they mature they are making life changing decisions and at risk for making mistakes that could be life altering. Often it is during this period that they turn to their friends, who usually have little insight or experience, for advice. How much better would it be for them to feel comfortable turning to a parent? Who is going to have their best interests at heart more than the people who raised them?
Trust is the willingness to make ourselves vulnerable to another. When our kids are young we go out of our way to make sure that they don’t trust others inappropriately, we try to limit how vulnerable they can become. This protection can often mean that the first trust violations they experience occur at home: failure to follow through on a promise, or a set of rules that seems to apply only to them and not the adults in their lives.
The intent of this volume of the Trust Coach newsletter is to raise awareness about trust and the role it plays in raising our kids. Parenting is an incredibly complex task and there isn’t a manual that comes along with each newborn child. There’s no silver bullet; the perfect approach and parent for one child may be a train wreck with another. We often don’t talk about parenting, sharing best practices or problem solving with friends. My goal here is not to tell people what they are doing wrong or suggest they are bad parents. I am hoping to add something to people’s tool boxes that have worked for me and others I’ve helped.
Key points include:
- Command and control
- Expert opinions
- The trust model
Read the full article, Trust and parenting, building a deeper bond, on TrustUnlimited.com.