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How to Achieve Win-Win-Win Outcomes


How to Achieve Win-Win-Win Outcomes

Darien Smith shares an article that explains the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict mode and how you can use it.

“It is literally true that you can succeed best and quickest by helping others succeed.”

— Napoleon Hill

My success is predicated on my ability to help others succeed. Whether it’s an investor looking to reach a specific risk-adjusted return hurdle, a business owner who wants to retire with a healthy nest egg, or a management team who wants to triple growth over the next five years, I only succeed when they succeed.

My job as a trusted partner for investors, business owners, and management teams is to create win-win-win outcomes by gaining a solid understanding of the needs and desires of each stakeholder, while openly addressing all expectations. Non-aggressive, assertive communication and cooperation is key. People generally deal with conflicting needs and desires in one of five ways: competing, avoiding, compromising, accommodating, or collaborating. For reference, I’ve included the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument, a graphic representation of the five ways people deal with conflict, or rather, seemingly conflicting needs and desires.

The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument

Assertiveness is the extent to which a person attempts to satisfy his or her personal agenda and desired outcomes. Cooperativeness is the extent to which a person is willing to focus on satisfying another person’s needs and desired outcomes. Because most of us are self-interested, utility-maximizing individuals, it tends to be easier to focus on your personal agenda and desired outcomes rather than focusing on the other person’s desired outcomes. However, if we only focus on our own desires and needs then we may naively believe that every negotiation or business transaction is a zero-sum game. It is not. Magic happens at the confluence of assertiveness and cooperativeness. Collaboration.

Key points include:

  • Vision and alignment

  • Value and collaboration

  • Stakeholder buy-in

Read the full article, Shared Values + Shared Vision = Shared Success, on